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There are gestures, and then there are gestures. What they mean can just be a matter of perspective. Where am I going with this?
I had a call from the Assistant Principal at the elementary school today. Carter, my first grader, was sitting in his office. Mr. Grant explained to me that he had been sent there for flipping the bird at another boy in the class. Right. Your probably as stunned as I was. My first thought was, “Whaaa?!” and then in my head are running thoughts while listening to Mr. Grant explain. I’m thinking, “How does he know when to flip someone off? Where did he learn how to shoot a bird? I hope they don’t think that’s something we do at home.”
As Mr. Grant, and later Carter’s teacher, explained it, Carter was sitting with the assistant teacher at his desk. He looked up and saw his friend and flipped him a bird. Eh, no big deal. Mr. Grant asked Carter if he was mad at the boy. Carter was confused and said no. Mr. Grant asked if the boy did something to him or if he hurt him and again, Carter said no. Carter told the teacher, Mr. Grant and myself that he saw someone on the bus do it. I’m certain he has seen it from the older kids in our neighborhood, perhaps on the bus, perhaps somewhere else. Who knows. What he did not know was that it was bad. Mr. Grant explained to Carter that using that gesture means “You’re a jerk!” or “I don’t like you!” We determined that Carter using that gesture was supposed to mean “Hey dude, high five” or “What’s up budddy?”
Carter was bewildered and pretty scared. He was definitely remorseful and I, of course, had a firm talk with him. He wrote a letter apologizing to Ms. Lilley and also apologized to the boy. All is well.
So, in the end, the meaning is all a matter of perspective. Perhaps, we all need to think more like a six year old.
